Wednesday, January 03, 2007

For Constipation, snort this:

Too embarrassed to admit it, Avery has suffered from irregularity, aka constipation, since birth. But in the unique bond called brotherhood, he consorted with his superman senior, and together they came up with a plan to cure that uncomfortable ailment.

It was my fault for thinking that they were innocent, sitting there in the dark living room, looking out the window at the rainy day outside. Most parents make that mistake multiple times in a child's life- for children are usually anything but innocent, most especially when they appear so quiet and serene. And so it was, as I prided myself on actually achieving the feat of putting laundry away while they happily entertianed eachother, playing together and exchanging indecipherable conversations in the window.

Eventually I turned on the light. And innocent fled with the darkness. I don't know what I saw first, Avery's powder white face or the snowy white mess on the floor.

Then I saw the bottle and it all made sense. Avery must have confided in big brother as to his abdominal discomforts; Donovan, who pretends not to listen to mommy and daddy's conversations knew of a remedy; the remedy called "Benefiber" happened to be opportunely left on the kitchen counter; and mommy always gave them a good 10 mintute head start called benefit of the doubt. So they consorted, and thus succeded in their mission, for Donovan sat in pride watching as baby brother lapped up the stuff like it was sugar. The stuff is tasteless & odorless, and so it was obvious AJ was in it for purely medicinal reasons.
Avery was obviously on a hardcore hand to mouth mission. He didn't ingest much, in case anyone is concerned, he just kept slobbering on his little hand and then dipping it on the floor to collect the fiber like a bumble bee to pollen.

It was one of those moments when yelling was futile. Besides, every mom knows that discipline is useless when you can't keep a straight face.

Whether or not they actually succeded in their ultimate goal will inevitably depend on AJ's next diaper. Can't wait for that. Signing off now to write a letter of thanks to the inventor of the hand-vac.

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